Wensum Column: Fakenham writer Jim Harding discusses regrets in life
In his weekly column, Fakenham writer Jim Harding discusses regrets…
I wonder if any reader regrets, as do I, something left unsaid or undone from the past.
This short tale might clarify what I mean. It was prompted by hearing a sentence from The Beatles song, Yesterday, which most of you will know.
One line begins “I said something wrong” which to me resonates with the idea of a romance and perhaps a break-up.
But no, it referenced a moment when Paul McCartney embarrassed his mum by the way she spoke and which he presumably failed to apologise for later.
My parents lived in Old Woking and after we came up to Norfolk to live some forty years ago I tried to make regular trips south to see my mum, who was invariably at home.
This meant a coach ride from Fakenham to Victoria station – a bonus travel opportunity back then - plus a tube link to Waterloo with regular trains connecting to Woking.
I loved to walk from Woking station through the park to my old home as a reminder of living through my childhood years in that whole area.
It also gave me a chance to talk to her at length and find out a bit about the life she led before she married my dad.
One gem that emerged from all this illustrated for me how women were so marginalised in that pre-war era as to their opportunities.
She had to leave school early without any chance of furthering her education, despite having a sharp brain. Job prospects were fairly minimal and never amounted to much.
One stood out as worthy of my attention. I don’t know the details but she managed to find employment as a carer - or “in service” as it was then described- in a big house in Norfolk, not far from Dereham.
This was Bradenham Hall where her responsibilities were mainly concerned with one small child, although this became two when the household parents produced a second youngster.
All I knew of Bradenham from my Fakenham perspective was that it had a football team and a cricket team whose matches were often reported in the local press.
Increasingly I wanted to find out more. Mum and dad, being elderly, rarely travelled much at that stage but did once find their way up here to stay with us.
So on a sunny afternoon we set off by car to do a bit of exploring which included a brief stop at Bradenham Hall itself.
We paused to look at the entrance driveway but failed to drive along it and introduce ourselves. In retrospect I have always regretted this something left undone on my part.
Of course the people living there would no longer have been connected with the family mum knew and lived with.
But I’m sure she would have enjoyed a closer look at the house and its gardens, which had meant so much to her all those years back.
We might even have been invited in when her upstairs, downstairs history with the Hall was described. As a great talker, I reckoned she would have repeated this experience to many friends and neighbours in Old Woking. At least my parents invested me with an outgoing nature which has meant such a big difference to the life - or lives - I have been able to live.
The fact that I have invariably taken a chance that has often worked out well - particularly in travelling around the world in my twenties rather than settling down comfortably like the vast majority of my contemporaries - has proved to me, at any rate, to be of immense gratification.
As my close friend Mick with whom I hiked across much of Tasmania would agree, if it’s a good opportunity, do it now rather than regret later not doing it at all.
A time capsule is to be buried in Fakenham Parish church during the improvements to its main entrance door and the area just within.
Because of the excavation required, an archaeologist will be in attendance at times. The capsule will endeavour to illustrate aspects of our local community as it existed in 2024 or thereabouts.
As a racing enthusiast, I was delighted to offer a race card from the most recent jumps meeting at our track in recognition of the way this sport has been so popular here.
